September 7, 2019
How does it feel when you see that car you really want? You say ,OH MY! OMG! OH Yeah!
Oh what a feeling it is to say OH from deep within. When something feels right or feels good, the first thing one says is OH! Nowadays its OMG! But however we say it, the feeling is still the same. OH! Even in bible days, the book of Psalms contain the most powerful expression of sheer joy, Oh that men would.
I want to give you a brief outline of what to expect in this blog going forward. I am going to list a table of contents so that you get an idea of what this writing is all about.
1. Meeting the Munchkins - Never let people push you into something they are not going to do for themselves.
2. Scarecrow or the Straw Man - The hype theory states that "People and things who's surface value is less than their original substance. He had a lot of bright ideas, but no follow through.
3. Tin Man - Playing the blame game. He said nobody oiled him and now he is rusted up only a few feet from an oil can.
4. The Lion - Cowardice is a trait wherein excessive fear prevents an individual from taking a risk or facing danger. It is the opposite of courage. As a label, "cowardice" indicates a failure of character in the face of a challenge. One who succumbs to cowardice is known as a coward.
Which one are you? A scarecrow (Mr. Bright ideas), A tin man ( Mr. Blame my failure on everyone but me) and The Lion ( He could have, would have and should have).
Welcome to OZ The OH Zone!
I hope you are having a wonderful day. I hope also that you woke up this morning with high anticipations to get out there and do what ever it is that you do! I know that you went to bed last night and could no wait to get to sleep so that you could rise early and get back to that drawing board. Excited and calm and motivated you are in the OH! Zone. Oh my goodness, I just couldn't wait to get up this morning and go for my long bike ride to clear my head and prepare to take on wall street. I just could not get my juice down fast enough so I could get this ride in and get over to the office. The OZ is the greatest place you ever going to be involved in. It gets you up and puts you to sleep, it makes you smile, when everyone is frowning. You know that there are going to be problems along the way today, but you are part of the solution to things, and not part of the problem.
In the story of OZ, Dorothy was loosing her dog to an evil sort of Old rich lady and she was not going to stand around with all the fear mongers, and watch her innocent little puppy be euthanized by a tyrant. You and me, we can suffer from inaction when things aren't going our way, or we can spring into action and take aim at a solution. When you are in the OZ you are a solution provider, a caregiver, an inspired leader from every side. Nobody on the farm would dare go up against the CEO of the community, because they were stuck in the "dust bowl". The dust bowl is a desert of defeat and a place where no water is. Without water, there isn't any growth from anything around, stuff is dead. First of all, it isn't necessarily bad to be in a spiritually dry place, or business dry place or sports dry place, it what we do with lesson and the time we are the dry places that matter. While I am in this dry place, I should be working on a better plan, and it is the planning at a high level, that is making me smile right now. It is the planning of new ideas, which have me beaming along while everyone around me thinks it is over for me. Are they going to be surprised, when I roll up on them in royalty. I will be back, I am back, I'm just going through the OZ one step at a time on the Yellow brick road. I am meeting new people with awesome potential, and I am bringing them along with me. New comrades and new team mates are going to make a difference in where I end up this time. I am not going back home, I am coming home.
Welcome to OZ
The most high has a reason and a purpose for creating you. You know what you were created for, by what you enjoy doing the most. Look at this way, one woman has earned a million dollars because she enjoyed picking up old car hubcaps, her name is Hub Cap Annie. I met her one time, and she expressed how she just stayed focused on the ground where the old hubcaps would lay. That every time she looked up at people, they just didn’t understand why she would seek such an adventure. One should learn that lesson to stay focused on the ground where TMH has placed you. And please not allow people to change your focus or direction.
Stay with what makes you happy and don’t allow disgruntled people who aren’t happy in their walk to discourage you in your walk. I don't care what law you live by, whether its the Law Of Attraction, Social Justice Theory, or the Bible (KJV), just stay in the OZ. Stay in that place that puts you in a good mood about yourself and others around you. Get in you happy stance, and do you happy dance. Turn off CNN and FOX and put on some of your old high school rock music and play air guitar. Do it damn you! I bet you will feel better and care free. Remembering from where you came from and how you got here, you made it once and you will get back there agian. Its going to be challenging, but the first time was a challenge, aint no difference here to me. I see you climbing out of this cyclonic depression, this downward spiral, and pulling youself up buy your nike shoe straps, just do it!
The OZ
Her name was Dorothy Gail, she was orphaned at a very young age and had to live with an older Aunt and Uncle who owned a farm in Kansas. We remember the story of how when her most prized possession was threatened, there was no one to come to her rescue. She was a bright eyed and inspired teen age child, but that inspiration did not spill over into or onto anyone else around the farm. People around her did not believe what she believed, that somewhere over the rainbow things would be better. They had given up and were languishing in time with no drive or ambition to strive for circumstances to improve. Here was this happy young girl who dreamed big and danced on fences, yet not a single inhabitant of the farm could grasp her energy and vision. They wanted no part in going up against authority to save TOTO, the little dog she loved dearly.
You know how it is, don't you? The business just got bought or overtaken by a new owner, and nobody has any idea what to do or how to do anything. You come to work, and people have their heads down with fear, no one is hopeful, all are doubters. You stand up and try to get everybody to see the bright side of what could be a blessing and people don't want to hear it. Or have you been a church where the Pastor is stuck in a rut, with no ideas of how to generate positive influences over the flock, you go there and just sit. Wondering what the other churches are up too. Asking the Almighty to come right now and take you out of this duldrum and dead organization. Have you or are you on a last place sports team and nobody seems to care about how to turn it around. They are complacent and content with the fact they can't be cut from the team, because everybody is lousy at their job. Such was the world of Dorothy Gail. When all the confusion came to upset her world or happiness and joy, not a single person around here would stick out their neck to save her dog. Toto was Dorothy's O-Zone and she knew it. Toto was the link to her everyday motivation and Toto was worth the fight to save. Are you willing to go up against those tyrants who move against your happiness? Or are you like the people around Dorothy who make excuses and filled with fear of loosing their little job that half pays the bills, and they can't even save any money.
We expect those around us who say they love us, to come to our rescue. Matter of fact, we almost will wholeheartedly convince ourselves that mom and dad has got our back when things go wrong. But in the case of Dorothy Gail, she found no resolve coming from family and friends. They offered no restitution for saving TOTO from the evil landlord. Not a single one of them on the farm, possessed a pugnacious disposition in giving Dorothy any fighting chance to get her dog back. They were cowards at best, without the will to take on a challenge so noble as to rescue a pet dog from the grasp of an insolent and audacious character. As you live in your OZ, you can stay there by lowering your expectations of people. Expectation has value, you know that the guy next to you is a 5 or less out 10, therefore, don't expect him to see any reason to improve the spreadsheet or, help you with an advance project. He will make excuses and you know, so don't allow him in your space please. Keep it too yourself and work on it by yourself. You will feel the inspiration and they will see the big smile on your face as you mapping out success for yourself. You can't always bring people along with you. They don't care as much as you, and are often critical of you. Saying things behind your back, which by he way, can't harm you unless you depend on people liking you for yourself to be happy. Stay in the Zone when nobody wants to come along. Go by yourself and be true to your cause at all cost, because in the end, it is about you, your destiny, you obligations to higher power and too your loved ones. Stand alone when standing determines where you ultimately sit.
Look around you, are you surrounded with cowards? Cowards and quitters, they are deserters, and will leave you when things get complicated and decisions to fight are crucial. They had resolved themselves to protect their own interest and not risking their own future. In such a crisis, you will find that many people are like this. They will not fight for you or with you, with a motive that once you are out of the way, then there is more for them at the bottom. Instead of mounting up a fight to go higher with you they are not aligned with you, and they stand back waiting for you to fall and be destroyed. These people are the last ones you should expect to assist you in achieving your dreams and ambitions.
Dorothy Gail (A Gail is a high forced wind), Nothing should overcome you, blow you down, shake or rattle you. Hurricanes are high forced winds and you don’t see anyone trying to control it. When you have such a metaphor for a name, it was evident that she was a determined child and was willing to go any measure to rescue Toto. What this shows you and me is the difference we can find in just the people around us. They all see the problem, and know that it’s not fair to the poor animal. Similar to the family garbage can that’s so full that as it’s running up the wall and down on the floor, but nobody seems to mind. Dorothy springs into action in spite of the disrepute of others around her. With all of these elements against her, Dorothy Gail garners up the will power and strength to save her pet dog from being euthanized. She risked her life, her reputation, her livelihood and everything else she believed in, to save Toto. The only things in life worth living for and taking risk for, are things you will die for. We all need to find a type of Toto in our life and in our work. What we live for, is what we will die for. Dorothy rescues her pet, because it gave her the love and life she cherished.
Whatever we live for, is what will get us up in the morning and the same is what we will do, even if it kills us. So don’t listen to those around you who don’t understand why you have to be on time for your job, or the first one in line, or always trying to get things done right. At the end of the day, you will be the one who has to rescue them from the violent cyclone that coming to shake up everyone’s world. Stay determined to get you degree, keep talking about being successful, because we have enough failure in the world to go around. Be the high forced wind of change like Dorothy and ultimately bring everyone up and out their misfortune and destitute world. This is OZ for the Millennium.
THE CYCLONE
When Braun wrote this story about the Wizard of OZ, he indicated that a storm arose in the form of a cyclone. A cyclone is a tropical storm more along the lines of a hurricane. I would not say this could happen in Kansas as dry as it was at the time. Which to my inquisitive mind thinks he intentionally had another meaning for this to be in the story. Cyclones are not as powerful and Gails, which are high forced winds. Gails, can cause cyclones to switch directions or be directed another direction. Things will come against us always trying to change our direction in life. When you know that the path you on is the way to go, then you should not quit. The just must live by faith, I am told. "Fortune favors the bold" and " Fortune favors the brave " and " Fortune favors the strong. If you are going to live and work and play in your Ozone, then you must remember these quotes. We are getting up everyday, just to get by and do the same thing, getting the same old stale results. I want more money on my paycheck, I need the next promotion in the company. Why should you be so content? You can be content but also bold, brave, strong and determined to make life easier for yourself and those around you. If you can invent a new and better chair for yourself, it should also be designed to help those who work around you. The world and the earth has some serious challenges, and only brave, bold, energetic individuals can save us. God is waiting to inspire you to do something great that benefits everyone. Dorothy's risk taking attitude allowed her to make life better for everyone in the end of the story.
The cyclone is a metaphor for depression and the downward spiral it causes. With nobody on her side, nobody to talk to after she leaves Mr. Marvel ( conscience), Dorothy is tossed into a period of depression. It is a lot like times when I have had great ideas, and people frown on it and make fun of you. They are so afraid that you will excel them, that they shut you down and out of the office conversations. She wanted to go home before the storm broke, and we want people to accept us with our bright ideas and good intentions, but it does not work out always. We find ourselves alone holding on to the one dream we have and knowing deep inside that all things are possible. However, its a lonely place, when nobody else see's what you see and feels what you feel about the circumstances. We all want and need a support system, when times are hard and direction is unclear. There is some research out there of course, that mentions when those of us with "mental health" challenges (depression, anxiety, bi-polar disorder) have a good support system of family and friends, we actually do better than those who do not have a support system. It only makes sense. After all, as it is with any challenges in life, we all do better with the support of family and friends. Could Dorothy have avoided the Cyclone of depression and gotten a better result is hard to determine. She had to go back the same way she had come and the same people would still be there. Support is not about having people around you, but it is more important to have those around you who understand you and are familiar with your motivations. I guess I am trying to say it like this, when its your birthday you really aren't happy when ordinary people complement you. If you mom or day forgets your birthday or a sibling forgets, it seems to make the whole day be bad. We want to be encouraged by those whom we love, even though sometimes we are at odds with them, we still need their encouragement. The depression went deeper than expected for Dorothy, because she knew that the same people where back there at home. These have no inspiration or motivation to go somewhere over the rainbow.
The OZone Layer
We all know that the earth's Ozone layer protects it and us from the harmful rays of the sun. When you have joy and inspiration from something or someone, this gives you protection from depression and dismay. The Ozone keeps you at a high level of satisfaction, and never negotiate with anyone who tends to discourage you or take aim at reducing your happiness about what it is that you enjoy. I enjoy reading science and philosophy, I want to be reasonably intelligent enough to hold conversations with successful people who have done remarkable things. When I pursued my PHD, I was in that zone, but I let people around me that never see the value of higher education. They are under the impression that if you make a lot of money, then you should be happy and go to work. But Working and having money is not the essence of the Ozone. Money is a reward for work, work is what you do when you're not having fun. So might as well find work that is like having fun and you will make the most money possible. Many are out there working jobs that lead to no place, and they get stuck working check to check. It's a form of welfare if you ask me, when your earning potential is the same as the 10 people on the assembly line. And the only difference is overt-time if you can get. No wonder so many Americans are miserable worker bees, with no inspiration to climb higher or do better for themselves. Protect your inspiration, do not negotiate with these people across the cubicle. You know that you are just here temporarily, so smile and do a really good job, keeping you mind on things above this. I worked in a factory for 15 years and got married 3 months after I started the damn job. I was so miserable because I had dropped out of engineering school just to have legal sex. We have to transmute sexual desire, turn into an inner power over self because its a primary reason so many are trapped in dead ends. Dead end marriages, dead end jobs, dead end careers, dead end religion. Trying to have someone in the bed with us to make us feel needed and wanted.
The Ozone awaited me when I was on that shop floor. I would put all my energy and time in makings sure my area was clean, my machine was clean and my product was graded at 97 percent quality. At first I was talked about by people who didn't want to be challenged by my presence, but I did it anyway. I knew someday that I was going be out of that 120 degree furnace. Sad to say you could not tell 90 percent of the folks that the end was coming. They were content with their lil hourly wage, didn't want to go back to school. Sure were not trying to make their job easier by offering new ideas. I did all that and it felt good. I once hated going to work at American Olean, but once I forced myself into the OZ, my days went faster, and my life was better. I was not bitter and angry when I went home in the evening. If you find yourself in that position, you must change your mind about it. Change for you, not anyone else. If they want to lay around in dirt, you sure don't have too. And when they ask you why you are doing all this and all that, tell them, you are called to a higher purpose and that this is just a test for something higher and better. Albert E. Said this, "The problems we now face, cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created the problem." What ever you were thinking when you got stuck in a rut, will keep you in that rut. Change our thoughts and change our lives. I wanted a promotion so bad that I went to college at night and even on weekends, but I was thinking about staying in that factory which is not where I really wanted to be. I changed my major from Business management, to Information Technology and got out before the plant closed. Why was I trying to get promoted in a factory that was eventually going to close down? Why was preparing to stay, when they had already told us, they were cutting back. Common sense tells you, that if you want a different result, you should try a different method. Don't get me wrong, I did use my business skills, later on in life as a manager, but it was my training for the next generation of the Information technology that got me into the OZ.
Meet the Munchkins
White I was at work there, I would go around to everybody trying to motivate them, young and old. I didn't care if they thought I was arrogant or foolish, I was in the Ozone and talking about it made me work hard, be focused, be alert and make wise decisions. Which takes me to the Munchkins. These are people who feed off you, but never going to go along with you. Always telling you what they would do, if they were you. Its scheme to get out of they way, because they are not going no where right now. And If you're gone, then there is more dead end opportunity for them. The munchkins came to make Dorothy their leader because she accidentally kills the wicked terrorist witch. Beware of little people who are always cheering you on, just to get you gone and out of the way. Why didn't they get on the damn yellow brick road and go see the Wizard about the Witch? Why because they knew he was a phony. They just wanted Dorothy gone and to move on. If people cant use you, they try and figure a way to get rid of you. They work with everyone except you, they ignore your bright ideas, your hard work, your dedication, all because you wont allow them to have their hands around your throat. Had Dorothy taken the position, she would have to spend the rest of her life fighting for the munchkins. It always bothered me how that people will give your all the tools you need as long as you work for their dream and not your own. I once had an employer who bought laptops for all the engineers, but they could only be used for company business. And they would have you bring it in for inspection, to see if you even tried to use it for other business. One after another would turn the laptop back in, because as Engineers, we are prone to come up with new ideas and we study new methods. Who has the time to try and work around company policies, when there was so much new ideas coming out about the internet. One by one, they left the company and went another company across town, who did the same thing. Bought you a laptop for company business, but they also encouraged you to be creative and do whatever you want, as long as you didn;t destroy the computer in the process. They guys over there were always happy and cheerful when we would meet them at lunch. All of them had higher certifications, they all had their own websites and side business. That company today has grown over 110 percent over 10 years. Meanwhile, my old company has lost its best engineers to other companies. And their customer base is the same as its always been with 5 percent growth. The munchkins where a boring group who were low energy, apathetic, slothful organization. I hope you never go to work for Munchkins.
Where there is no visionThe Munchkins had no 'Vision" . Vision is the bridge between the present and the future. The Bible says that without it we perish or go “unrestrained,” Vision gives pain a purpose. Our girl had a lot oif pain and discomfort and with Vision on the future, it was likely she would have settled for the first opportunity that came. She was not home in here heart and mind, so staying with the Munchkins, with no options that say stay here. Those without vision spend their lives taking the path of least resistance as they try to avoid discomfort. Dorothy was not aware of the problem of witches, but she had her own experience with the evil lady landlord. This was enough experience for her to know that she had to maximize her options. She didn't think of herself more highly than she needed to. Many people would have jumped to be the head of a state, because they have pride and think they have something to prove to everyone. But this can often lead to incompetence on the job. The level of sacrifice that a vision requires will determine the size of people who follow. Sacrifice separates the small from the great. Dorothy took a look around and saw that the challenges of leadership would only take her as high as those whom she was leading. She would have had to do all the fighting, and all the leading. Its not a great experience when you have to be the first in the fight all the time, and behind you are a agglomeration of cowards.
Vision is what we see, but it is also the way in which we see. Dorothy didn't see herself as the leader of the Munchkins. She did not see her self as any body's queen. Vision requires total honesty with yourself. People can try and pump you up, but you have to know down inside yourself, whether you are strong enough to lead or maybe better off if you were a good number 2 leader. Vision is the lens that interprets the events of our life, the way we view people and our concept of God. Dorothy was not short on vision because she didn't take the job offer, she just knew it was not what she was supposed to be doing. You and i will never be happy doing something we know we are not called to do. You happiness may not come until you realize that you have to find your calling. Your O-zone layer is that calling and it calls you everyday and every hour. It wakes you up, and goes to sleep with you. This calling takes over in your dreams at night and inspires you when its raining outside. Find your O-zone and you will also find that the most-high will give you the vision that goes with it, to make all things possible.
Dorothy was like all of us dreamers. with a dream in our soul, heart and mind. Our dreams stem from our uniqueness. We all have gifts, which are part of our higher purpose here on this earth to share with the world. We must use our gifts as catalyst to make things positive happen all over the planet. Our gifts are also our calling and our occupation should be in alignment with this calling, and this takes us to the Ozone where we feel happy and fulfilled. It's not always easy to generate the courage to go after your dreams and leave status quo behind. Questions will always come to mind which have to be answered. One question is What if you fall short? The fear of failure is always one of the first impulses we feel. Many people start out with a strong belief and lots of drive about what they want to achieve and then trouble comes and we want to step back into the mundane. But I say that when times do get tough, it is important to go back to the "why" behind what you're doing. Are you doing this for yourself, or for the better of the world? Are you in this for the money and fame it can generate? Am I trying to impact my community to make more opportunity for other to succeed? When things get tough it cane make your day feel like a loss, or you can face the challenge and depend on divine inspiration to show you the way through. It may not feel like you are successful, but when you stick to it, you eventually learn what it is you are supposed to be doing. I heard a quote once that "Success is the sum of small efforts, tried day in and day out. Each do you face the challenges, you should feel good about you efforts. Each day is an opportunity to be more focused on the solution. Difficult times are enablers that bring us back to pure intentions. Ask yourself a question: Will I stay connected to your dreams and vision in a positive way. Do I let what is going on right now, effect the rest of my future in a negative way or do I get some help from an outside source? Many great entrepreneurs find the strength to go get help before giving up too soon. Sometimes our goals are more difficult than we imagined, and things aren't happening as fast as they "should. But I'm here to tell you: Don't give up on your daydream, your dream, your night dream! The O-zone is that little voice inside telling you and pulling you is some not-so-subtle guidance on how to live your life by faith with intent and purpose. If you want to be in the Ozone, you have to follow the calling and live and breathe your truth about yourself and what it is you are dreaming to do.
The munchkins had no heart and wanted our accidental tourist to do their fighting. They knew nothing about Dorothy except that her house had fallen on the wicked witch and killed the woman. Are you caught in the munchkin cycle always running around putting our fires for other people and not really focusing on what makes you great. There are many people out there who will ride you until you die. Avoid people who are masterful manipulators when it comes to solving crisis. They try to build you up to do their bidding because deep down inside, they really have a lot of fear of failure. So they pretend that you are so smart and wise and astute and all the time, they do this to set you up for bad consequences. Before you jump up and jump in to a fight you have no dog in, you should make it clear that its not your fight to win or loose. Don't be so ambitious to want to win fights for other people, it ultimately gives you a name that you don't want.
There is a quote that I found to be so true “It’s not selfish to love yourself, take care of yourself, and to make your happiness a priority.” ~Mandy Hale
It sucks, doesn’t it? I makes you mad, and truly frustrates you when people ask too much of you? People who steal your time and drain your energy. Who just keep on attacking your natural defenses, abusing your loyalty and exploiting your love. You want to stop giving, to say no! But frustratingly, when you try to pull away, they say or imply that you’re the selfish one. And in some cases it’s unwanted or impractical to distance yourself from that person, especially if they’re a family member or even a partner. But if you do give in to the barrage of persistent requests, the cumulative effect can be devastating to your emotional and physical well-being. I know from personal experience. It feels good at first because you think you are really making it easy for someone else, until they never stop asking you for more help. Had Dorothy taken up the fight for the munchkins, she would have been stuck in that little place doing all the things big people do for little people.
The little people wanted Dorothy to give up her life for theirs. But at what cost would that be? I have suggestions for those who want to live in the OZ.
It’s Your Life—Take It Back
Giving up your life for anyone isn’t noble unless they are incapacitated. It isn’t healthy. It absolutely isn’t necessary.
Being the go-to person makes you the go-nowhere person. Your life is on hold, permanently.
And if this sounds harsh, I’m sorry, but forever putting yourself second doesn’t help anyone.
Aiding and abetting over-demanding behavior in others will never serve you or them. It will only perpetuate their own lack of self-reliance.
If I’d said no to Mum, she would have had every chance of making a fantastic second go of her life.
Don’t wait until hindsight tells you that you did it wrong.
Take your life back right now.
It’s your time. Go look for the OZone of your life. You have what it takes to make it for your self.
How to say no when you really need to. I am going to insert an article from Inc magazine, because I could not say it any better.
Here's how you can effectively say no:
1. Say it.
Don't beat around the bush or offer weak excuses or hem and haw. This only provides an opening for the other person. Don't delay or stall either. Provide a brief explanation if you feel you need to; however, don't feel compelled. The less said the better.
2. Be assertive and courteous.
You might say, "I'm sorry I can't right now but will let you know when and if I can." This approach is polite, and puts you in a position of power by changing the dynamic. You're taking charge, telling people you'll let them know when and if you can. Another example, "I appreciate your asking me for help, but I'm stretched too thin right now to devote the time to be of quality help to you."
3. Understand peoples' tactics.
Many people and organizations use manipulation techniques, whether knowingly or not. For example, think about when you get a solicitation for a donation to a charity and there are forced options: "Would you like to donate $10, $20, $30, or X amount?" Another tactic: "Most people donate $20--how much would you like to donate?" This relies on social pressure.
4. Set boundaries.
People sometimes have a hard time saying no because they haven't taken the time to evaluate their relationships and understand their role within the relationship. When you truly understand the dynamic and your role, you won't feel as worried about the consequences of saying no. You'll realize that your relationship is solid and can withstand your saying no.
5. Put the question back on the person asking.
This is highly effective in a work situation. Let's say a supervisor is asking you to take on several tasks--more than you can handle. You might say, "I'm happy to do X, Y, and Z; however, I would need three weeks, rather than two, to do a good job. How would you like me to prioritize them?"
6. Be firm.
If someone can't accept your no, then you know the person is probably not a true friend or doesn't respect you. Stand firm, and don't feel compelled to give in just because that person is uncomfortable.
7. Be selfish.
Put your needs first. Not those of the person asking you for something. If you prioritize that person's needs over yours, you'll find your productivity will suffer and resentment will mount. Perhaps we can learn from Warren Buffett, who said, "The difference between successful people and very successful people is that very successful people say no to almost everything."
PUBLISHED ON: NOV 3, 2015 Inc.com
I hope you enjoyed reading that, It's okay to say no. There are many reasons why we should say no sometimes, and there are just as many reasons why we don't – and suffer for not doing so. The offer may be the chance of a lifetime, but is it the right place and right time for the offer. I realized in my life, that there were times I was a better assistant that I was a leader. I soon became the leader after watching the other guy make all the mistakes. Dorothy said no, and avoided the pitfalls of leadership, and you might ask, well what happened to the bright eyed and eager young lady who wanted to go over rainbows, she was still the same person. Being a dreamer should make you ignorant of your limitations. Saying no keeps us inside our personal comfort zone and away from unwanted stress. And also remember this: no matter what your reason for being scared to say no, it stems from your worries about what will happen when you do. Will people still like you? Will you miss an important opportunity? Will you seem lazy, uncaring, or incompetent? Acknowledge that you don't say no because you worry, then accept the fact that worrying never helps anything, regardless of the outcome. She worried about going home, and not staying with these people, which means she had her priorities in proper alignment.
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